


Gaily In the Night Wind Stealing

by Geekgrrllurking



Series: Rainbows Series [2]
Category: Guiding Light
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-12-15
Updated: 2012-01-05
Packaged: 2017-12-13 16:14:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 17,341
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/826243
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Geekgrrllurking/pseuds/Geekgrrllurking
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequel to "Rainbows Just Fade Away Anyway, Don't They?" because I couldn't leave Natalia in that sucking pit of angst.  The title is from this quote: "Hark! The merry chimes are pealing, Soft and glad the music swells, Gaily in the night wind stealing, Sweetly sound the wedding bells." - Eliza Cook</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

 

The wedding invitation is still in your trembling hand, clutched tight, like a lifeline. And maybe that’s exactly what it is, your way back into the light, scrambling desperately out of the hole that is your life.

 

You stand at the back of a small group of guests all gathered in this beautiful garden overlooking the ocean. Not for the first time you question what the hell you are thinking? That’s the secret, you haven’t been thinking. You didn’t even realize what you were doing until you cinched the airplane seatbelt tight and took note of the emergency exits, here, here, and here.

 

You slip your sunglasses onto your nose, covering your tired, red-rimmed eyes and wait. It feels like you haven’t stopped crying for weeks, not with the knowledge that you’d made your own bed now you would just have to live with it. No you’ve lived with that horror for seven years now. No it was the loss of something you didn’t think you could ever have and now even the possibility, the naked hope that you could have it was being taken from you. And that was just not acceptable.

 

Surely God in heaven isn’t so cruel. Somewhere when a door closes, a window opens. You know this, you believe this, but sometimes you need to go find that window and open it yourself. If only you’re not too late. You glance around taking deep breaths, trying hard not to cry yet again.

 

The small garden is lovely, white tulle wrapped around everything, yellow roses, Olivia’s favourites scattered everywhere. It is almost too painful just standing there, surrounded by things Olivia loves and not being a part of it. Not being one of them. Who’s to blame for that?

 

A wave of despair washes over you and you start to think that maybe this was a mistake, you shouldn’t have come. Your heart is breaking but can you do this to her, on her wedding day? You rationalize that you needed to see for yourself that Olivia was truly happy, to see for yourself the woman who claimed her heart, who took care of her and Emma in your absence. 

 

You nearly jump out of your skin as a warm hand touches your arm.

 

“Oh my God, it is you!” Emma wraps her strong arms around you and pulls you close for a long hug. You close your eyes, unprepared to come face-to-face with the seventeen year old girl you barely recognize. “I knew you’d come. I told Ava you would but she didn’t believe me.” Emma pulled away and smiled before starting to pull you towards the house. “We need your help…”

 

You smile the first true smile in what feels like forever.

 

  



	2. Chapter 2

 

  
  
You suddenly feel alive, connected, the blood pulsing through your veins again, burning away the apathy that you’ve been wallowing in for so long. You’ve been snatched out of the quicksand you had been drowning in by this wee slip of a young woman. Thank God.  
  
“Mom’s a mess, and you’re just the thing to snap her out of it. It’ll be perfect.” Emma’s eyes danced with happiness and something else, lurking just there in the shadows. Was it hope? Her voice deepens, and she sounds so much like her mother your heart nearly stops. “I’ve missed you, Natalia.”  
  
You swallow hard and all you can do is nod back for a moment until you get yourself back under control. You barely recognize your own voice when you can finally choke out the words.  
  
“I’ve missed you too. All of you, so very much” Your eyes begin to mist over as your realize just how much time you’ve lost and that old pain washes through you. “More that you’ll probably ever know.”  
  
“Hey, you’re here now, that’s what counts.” Emma grins widely at you, and then drags you deeper into the elegant seaside home, her heels sounding loud on the tiles in the foyer. There is more tulle and flowers everywhere you look. You pull off your sunglasses and glance over at a small table of photos by the stairway, finding pictures of yourself scattered amongst the family shots. It’s the images of Olivia in the arms of another woman that hit you hardest, the thin brunette with bright blue eyes, smiling at each other, laughing together, living their lives together.  
  
The life you could have been living with her.  
  
Your stomach churns and once again you realize you're too late, you fool.  
  
“Natalia? Are you okay?” You barely hear Emma ask softly.  
  
“I’m fine, baby.” You whisper, this echo of past lies resonating inside you as your tears threaten to fall. You try to work your way through it, after all what did you expect? That Olivia would just sit and wait for you to get your head together. You sigh and try to take comfort that at least Olivia had her happy ending. One of you should, you reason.  
  
“Come on, she’s up here.” Emma squeezes your hand and you turn to follow her up the stairs and past the first bedroom. A commotion is happening inside but Emma just ignores it.  
  
“I don’t care if they have to wait until tomorrow morning; I am not going out there like this. Fix this birds nest of a hairstyle or else.” You hear a strange voice from inside, frustrated and angry, spewing out from the room, the door slightly ajar. Emma just rolls her eyes and drags you further down to the far end of the hallway.  
  
“Michelle can be a bit…much, y’know?” Your eyes meet and you know instantly Emma does not like the other woman in Olivia’s life. Not at all. You tuck that interesting tidbit deep inside and let hope flare for an instant. Maybe all is not lost after all.  
  
You follow silently behind Emma, your shoes quiet in the plush carpeting. She grins back at you bolstering your courage just a fraction. She taps at the door and opens it as you blow out a long breath, trying to settle your nerves.  
  
“Hey Mom, look who I found wandering around in the garden.” Emma steps deeper into the room, holding back her chuckle.  
  
“If it’s the caterer, she’s a dead woman. Ava is ready to--” Olivia’s voice is like a balm for your soul, washing over you, flowing like slow molasses across your skin, caressing and clinging seductively, keeping you snared and desperately wanting more. Carefully you move past Emma and come completely into the bedroom, preparing yourself for the inevitable.  
  
Nothing could prepare you for this though.  
  
The familiar scent of her perfume hits you first, and you remember that she always smelled so good, and then you finally see her. Her back is to you and she doesn't see you at first but that's fine, you have a moment to just take it all in. It might be all you'll ever get.  
  
Olivia is standing facing a full length antique mirror, dressed in a timeless silk dress, her hair swept up, revealing her elegant neck and diamond studded earrings. Your heart stops for a moment, as you realize time has been gracious to her and she is even more beautiful than you remember.  
  
And then your eyes finally meet her intense green ones, reflecting back at you in the mirror. And in that instant you know nothing will ever be the same again…

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

 

 

“Natalia?”

 

Her voice is soft, almost reverent, as Olivia speaks your name, layers upon layers of unspoken emotions and feelings threaded through the simply uttered word. You smile sadly at her reflection, watching as Olivia’s eyes widen, obvious questions swirling there, fear and hope and a quiet joy. It calls to you, to something buried so deep that you didn’t even know it was there anymore.  

 

“You’re here.” She’s trying to process it all, tilting her head in disbelief, or shock, it’s hard to tell but you’ll take it. At this point, you’ll take anything given to you from this gorgeous flesh and blood woman standing before you.

 

In the moment it takes for her to turn from her full length mirror to face you, her intense green stare has changed, suddenly flashing with a barely controlled emotions burning there. You swallow hard and nod slightly. You remember this Olivia too, the force of nature that bends you to her will or snaps you in two.

 

And then you smile, because you have already felt more alive in her presence in the past few moments than you have in the last seven years at Frank’s side. And it feels so good, like the universe has finally righted itself and you can breathe again.

 

Olivia doesn’t understand all this though. How could she? The last she knew she had left you in the safe comforting arms of Frank Cooper with a babe in arms. The picture perfect happy ending, except that wasn’t the ending you really wanted, was it? It wasn’t then and it isn’t it now. Fear had you in a strangle hold and it was slowly killing you, but no more. It was time to fight for the future you want.

 

If it already wasn’t too late.

 

Straightening your shoulders you take a step and then another, deeper into the bedroom, glancing over at Emma, who is still grinning like its Christmas and she’s just been given the best present ever. Turning back you focus once more on those amazing green eyes and before you have time to talk yourself out of it, you take the last few steps needed and wrap Olivia into your arms, holding her close. You close your eyes, cherishing the feel of her warm skin against yours, the scent of her perfume and something all Olivia surrounding you as you nuzzle into the crook of her neck.

 

“God, I’ve missed you.” You can’t stop the words tumbling softly from your lips, pulled straight from your heart, from your soul even. Olivia seems to melt against you then, her arms moving around your waist, tightening gently. You feel her shiver ever so slightly in your arms, and hope flares. Slowly you pull slightly apart, both of you reluctant. Safe in the circle of her arms, you look up into the tear filled green eyes, conflicting emotions still swirling there.

 

“I’ve missed you, too.” Olivia murmurs and you both smile sadly. You lean back in for another much needed hug.

 

“Are you happy?” You whisper just below her ear, needing to hear it from Olivia herself. She stills in your arms and you wait.

 

“Are you?” Olivia murmurs back, a little brusquely. You close your eyes dreading the conversation that is about to take place, but knowing it needs to happen. A small part of you wants to say ‘I asked you first’, but you don’t. You won’t do that dance of avoidance or denial anymore, no more running away from the truth. That pathway just leads to pain for everyone concerned.

 

“No.” You say into the warm skin of her neck before leaning back, searching her eyes carefully for any hints of what she is thinking as you cup her cheek.  “No, I’m not. But I’m trying to change that.”

 

Olivia frowns and blinks at you for a moment, processing your words before turning to Emma, who has been quietly watching with bated breath.

 

“Emma, honey, can you check on Ava for me. I don’t want her going ballistic on that caterer in her condition.” Olivia smiles as her youngest daughter grins and nods and heads quickly out of the room. You close your eyes as you hear the bedroom door click quietly shut behind her.

 

“She’s amazing, Olivia.” You can’t help the comment. The little bundle of energy you remember has turned into an elegant, poised young woman. Regret wraps around your heart and squeezes with cold fingers. You’ve missed so much.

 

“Yes, she is.” Olivia says softly, staring off into the distance where her daughter had just stood, lost in her own thoughts. Your own mind wanders as you look up at her, memorizing her features once again.

 

How often have you dreamed of this, wrapped in Olivia’s arms, alone, together in her bedroom? Is that all that it will ever be? You sigh and blink as you suddenly find Olivia watching you, her eyebrows descending.

 

“Why are you here?” Olivia whispers harshly, finally stepping away from you. You feel the loss keenly and you know this is it. The time has come to face the music.

 

“I couldn’t let you make the same mistake I did. I needed to make sure you were happy, and that…” You wave vaguely at the doorway, at the woman down the hallway terrorizing her hairdresser. “Michelle was the one for you.”

 

Olivia snorts in disbelief at that and then just glares at you.

 

“No really. Why are you here Natalia? What have I done, what planets have aligned, what sign from above did you see that you have decided to grace us with your presence?” Olivia glances up to the heavens, her arms wide and then back down to you, her eyes glittering with pain and anger. “It’s only taken you, what? Seven. Freakin’. Years.”

 

You duck your head for a moment, letting the pain and anguish wash over you. You blink away the tears that are threatening and then straighten your shoulders, standing tall and ready to fight back. You are not going to back down this time. You will not lie to Olivia anymore, or to Frank and least of all, to yourself.

 

“I was afraid, Olivia and you knew it. Don’t deny that you were so innocent in all of it either. You pushed me into Frank’s arms remember?” You pause as Olivia looks away, the truth of it hard to face, even after all this time. You swallow down your fear and take a step closer, reaching a hand out to touch her, your skin contrasting with the white silk of her dress. “I thought I was doing the best thing for everyone, that it was even what _you_ wanted, but all I did was screw everything up. And then there was little Nicky to think about.”

 

You turn look up and meet her sad eyes, both of you remembering how that had been the final nail in the coffin, changing everything, sealing both your fates. You reach up to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear, as she closes her eyes and leans in to your touch.

 

“God, I hurt you so badly,” You whisper softly taking in her sad beauty. “I’m so very sorry about that. And then it was as if I looked up one day and you had left me there, taking your love and our family and disappearing to the far side of the universe, without me.”

 

Olivia’s eyes snap open as her jaw clenches, her emotions barely in check.

 

“Well whose fault is that, huh?”

 

You flinch at the sudden harsh tone. Olivia sighs and steps away from you, obviously needing space to think.

 

“I couldn’t…” Olivia shook her head slowly, swallowing hard and moving to the nightstand to pull a tissue from the box sitting there. “It was too hard to watch someone else live the life I wanted with you. Okay? There I said it.”

 

You both just stare at each other, the past like a chasm gaping wide between the two of you. You bite your lower lip and watch as her eyes focus on your mouth. The old chemistry is still there, bubbling away, it just needs a chance to bloom.

 

“I’m getting a divorce, Olivia.” You finally blurt into the charged silence. Olivia’s eyebrows nearly disappear into her hairline. “I set the ball in motion before I flew out. Mel is looking after the paperwork for me and I broke it off with Frank last night.”

 

“It’s too late for us now.” Olivia slowly shakes her head, not wanting to believe you. And maybe she’s right, maybe it is too late. But the look in her eyes says otherwise. You just need to fight for what you want for a change.

 

“I don’t believe that.” You take a step forward and then another, as if approaching a wild animal, cornered and scared. “I’m leaving Frank regardless. I can’t live like that anymore, or raise my son in that mess. What is it teaching him about love? My soul is slowly withering and dying there, and I don’t think that’s what God intended for anyone.” You tilt your head and smile up at Olivia again, hoping that she can understand. “As for what’s between us, please just think about it before you do something you might regret too. I know the timing is…bad.”

 

“Bad?” Olivia snorts, her eyes narrowing. “It’s my wedding day, Natalia.” She shakes her head as you just smile weakly. She stares a moment longer, a small lopsided smile tugging at the corner of her mouth. “I still can’t believe you’re here.”  
  
”I can’t believe it either, but here I am.” You shrug and sigh; feeling like you can finally breathe again, the shackles of the past dropping in the bright light of the truth finally spoken and revealed.

 

“Seven years…” Olivia murmurs sadly. You both feel the pain of lost opportunity and time. Her eyes drift to the window as the stringed quartet start to play down in the garden.

 

“It’s not too late.” You whisper, hope and fear clutching at you. Her eyes turn back to you, locking and holding, a world of emotions displayed for only you to see.

 

“You don’t understand.” Olivia shakes her head with a bittersweet smile. “My relationship with Michelle, it’s…complicated.”

 

You take a final step forward and take Olivia’s hand in your own, your fingers tangling as you pull it to your chest, holding it over your thundering heart.

 

“It seems pretty simple to me. Do you love her?”

 

The silence is deafening as you search her eyes and wait for Olivia’s answer. She opens her mouth to speak but instead you both turn at the sound of a furious voice at the door.

 

“Of course she does.” 

 

 


	4. Chapter 4

 

“Michelle.” Olivia gasps and you feel her shift away from you, mentally and physically, as her focus turns to the woman standing in the doorway. The look on Olivia’s face shatters your hopes, as it is very obvious that she is extremely concerned about what her fiancée must be thinking.

 

The pain shooting through your heart is unbelievable and once again you know you have no one to blame here but yourself. You were a fool to think you could just come here and fix everything with the snap of your fingers. No you will have to fight for what you want, for the future you want and should have had a long time ago. You straighten your shoulders and prepare for the worst, and try to take comfort in the knowledge that you have nothing to lose here, and everything to gain. Your eyes lock with the dark haired woman standing in the doorway.

 

The first thing you notice is Michelle’s eyes. How could you not? They are a stunning light blue, like fire and ice, glittering with fury. She is a stunning woman, her hair falling in waves around her shoulders, her dress a strapless elegant gown, a string of pearls at her throat with matching earrings dangling from her ears. She takes a step into the room and looks back and forth between the two of you, an uncomfortable silence stretching out between the three of you. She glares at you a moment longer, deciding to focus on what she must see as a clear threat. What she must think of you, if Olivia has told her all the gory details.

 

Before you can say or do anything you realize that Olivia has stepped forward, pulling her hands from yours, moving herself between you and her fiancée, as if protecting you with her own body from the onslaught that you are certain is about to be rained upon you.

 

“Sweetheart, don’t you know it’s bad luck to see the bride before the wedding?” Olivia tries to tease, to cajole away the tension from the situation. It reminds you of the old days, in the boardroom of the Beacon, when she would try to sway a business deal her way. You blink and wisely stay silent, waiting to see how this power play will work out.

 

“I don’t care.” Michelle looked up and smiled at her lover, jealousy burning in your guts. You have no claim on Olivia any longer, so all you can do is watch. A well manicured hand slid along Olivia’s arm, possessive and familiar, the diamond engagement ring twinkling there, taunting you. “I heard raised voices and was concerned for you, baby.”

 

“More like dying of curiosity, you mean.” Olivia chuckles softly, reaching out to tuck a stray tendril behind her lover’s ear, the movement tender and sweet. Your heart sinks deeper into despair and you feel slightly nauseous. Michelle’s eyes flash back to you, suspicious and hard.

 

“So this is the infamous Saint Natalia then.” Michelle moves away from her lover, coming closer to you as you raise your chin in defiance of the insult.

 

“Be nice.” Olivia’s voice drops an octave, low and menacing, sending a shiver down your spine.

 

“I’m always nice, darling.” Michelle looks up, all innocence and light and you have to hold back a snort of disbelief. Was Olivia so blind to this woman’s manipulative games? Somehow you doubt that very much.

 

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” Michelle smiles insincerely at you, before extending a hand. “I’ve heard so _very_ much about you, from all of my girls, that I feel as if I know you.”

 

“So nice to meet you, too.” You lie smoothly and smile back, her skin cold and clammy against yours as she squeezes hard, the diamond engagement ring digging into your flesh as you shake your adversary’s hand. You nod your head and take your hand back. Glancing up at Olivia, you see her watching everything very carefully. Her face is a mask, but her eyes, dear God those eyes, burn into your very soul, and are warning you. Warning you, about what exactly?

 

You hear footsteps and anxious voices coming down the hallway and Olivia turns, distracted for a moment. Michelle moves closer to you, taking the opportunity presented, leaning so close that as your eyes lock you can see the grey flecks there and smell the alcohol on her breath.

 

“She’s mine now, so go back to your pathetic husband and your simple little farmhouse and leave us the hell alone.” Michelle snarls at you, shocking you with the intensity and bite behind her words.

 

She doesn’t know you very well, does she?

 

You talk a calming breath to collect your thoughts and then lean nearer; your lip curls at her ear as your backbone once again asserts itself, apparently made of steel.

 

“Olivia may marry you, but she will always be mine.”

 

You step back and your eyes lock with hers once more, and you see the truth of your bold statement reflected back at you as it hits her hard. Olivia glances back at the two of you, as you stand toe-to-toe with each other, neither one of you giving an inch.

 

“Dear God, I can’t leave the two of you alone for an instant.” Olivia mutters, discovering the tense situation happening before her eyes. You’d smile if you weren’t busy growling at the seething bride in front of you.

 

“Michelle, are you in there? You know you’re not supposed to see each other before the wedding. And your hairdresser is back there in a puddle, weeping. What is going on down here?” The agitated voice halts and from the doorway comes a flurry of activity as a very pregnant Ava pushes the door open, followed in by an almost skipping Emma. “Natalia?”

 

You finally break your stare down with Michelle when you hear your name and turn to face Olivia’s eldest daughter, who does not look any happier to see you. You smile softly, and glance down at her swollen stomach, which Ava is absently rubbing.

 

“I’ve been trying to tell you she’s actually here, Ava.” Emma squeezes past her sister and comes into the bedroom, rolling her eyes at her mother, and it warms your heart to see Olivia’s answering lopsided grin. “She never listens to me, Mom.”

 

“Ava, I’m so glad to see you.” You take a few steps closer, to hug the young woman. “Congratulations, I didn’t know you were expecting.” You whisper in her ear as you hear a quiet discussion going on behind you deeper in the room.

 

“Th-Thank you.” Ava holds tight to you for a moment and you soak up the warmth in the embrace. “I’m so glad you’re here.” She whispers, surprising you with the sincerity, before you pull apart. What the hell was going on around here?

 

“I told you she’d come.” Emma grinned widely, coming to the two of you, making it a loose group hug. “I had faith.” Your heart melts for a moment and you smile back.

 

“I don’t care, Olivia.” Michelle’s raised voice catches everyone’s attention, and the dark haired woman turns level a glare at you.  “Just do it.”

 

“Damn it.” Ava grumbles under her breath as the furious bride storms towards the door. “Come on Michelle. Let’s get you back to your room and have the make up artist freshen you up a little.”

 

Michelle sniffs haughtily and dabs at her eyes as she pushes past you, and out the bedroom door, Ava in pursuit, flashing an apologetic smile at you before disappearing down the hall. Emma squeezes your arm in sympathy and then leaves as well.

 

Olivia stands by the window, looking down at the garden, the soft romantic music of the stringed quartet below floating up, wrapping you both in its exquisite beauty. She pulls back the curtain a little further to stare out over the ocean, a light breeze coming into the room.

 

“I think you should leave.”

 

The air leaves your body as if you’ve been punched in the gut and leaves you reeling just as badly. Her voice is flat, devoid of emotion and for a moment you wish you had never come. And then just as quickly, you realized that it was inevitable that you would be standing here, that you had to at least try to reach out to Olivia.

 

“Olivia, please. Talk to me.” You whisper, your heart breaking as she turns to face you, her eyes burning into you with an intensity that you can almost feel.

 

“Don’t you see? It’s too late for us now.” Olivia’s eyes tear up, her lower lip quivering ever so slightly and you know deep down that this is not what she wants to say to you, but she is saying it anyway. You blink slowly, trying to take it in, but something is very wrong; you can feel it in your bones. You shake your head, in disbelief.

 

Olivia wipes a falling tear from her cheek and then turns to stare back out at the restless ocean.

 

“Just go.”

 

You stand in silence together a moment longer before you lower your head and nod, accepting your fate. The bedroom door clicks quietly closed behind you before your first tear falls.

 

  



	5. Chapter 5

 

You don’t even know how you got outside, but when you look up you realize that you can smell the roses from the garden. The heat of the sun is beating down on you and the oh so romantic music by the stringed quartet is cutting you to the quick. It’s all too much to bear; you never should have come, but something inside just wouldn’t let go. You couldn’t let her go, even though you’d screwed it up so very long ago. It was as if something deep inside was dying and if you were ever going to heal, you needed to see her one last time, to get some sort of closure. If you couldn’t win her back then it would have to be enough to just finally say goodbye. And apparently that’s exactly what it was. Goodbye to all your hopes and dreams.

 

“Natalia!”

 

You glance up as you hear your name on the breeze, coming from the doorway of the mansion. You turn to see who it is; surprised to find that Ava has followed you out. 

 

“Natalia, wait. Please.” Carefully the very pregnant woman makes her way towards you. It was the please that made you stop; otherwise you’d already be in your rental car crying your eyes out.

 

“Ava, take your time.” You say, worried that this heat and the excitement of the day could trigger labour. Ava waves off your concern as she finally comes to stand beside you.

 

“Whew, this heat sure doesn’t help.” The tall brunette fans herself, resting her hands on her hips and lower back, obviously trying to ease the pressure of the baby on her body.

 

“I should go. Your mother…” You try to explain, desperately wanting to just go and lick your wounds and try to figure out what the hell your next move is going to be.

 

“My mother just did as she was told.” Ava said with a sigh, running her fingers through her short dark hair. “Michelle is more than a handful, let me tell you.” She pauses, chewing on her lower lip clearly thinking about her next words. 

 

“So I’ve noticed.” You feel the flush of anger roll in the pit of your stomach. “Why is she with someone who is so controlling? It’s not like your mother at all…”

 

Ava snorted and shook her head, apparently not knowing the answer to that. Or not wanting to reveal everything she knew. She stares at you, hard, as if weighing her words carefully and you wait, because you’ve got nothing left to lose.

 

“You broke her, you know.” She finally says, your heart growing heavier with her words. You know it’s the truth though, so you stand there and take whatever is about to be thrown at you, because you so totally deserve it, and more. “Only my father has hurt her worse…”

 

Ava glances down, rubbing hand slowly over her swollen belly, the tiny life inside shifting with her touch. You meanwhile feel as if you’ve just been hit. You rally though, as you search for the right words.

 

“I don’t know what to say, Ava.” You finally force the words out. “I’m sorry isn’t nearly enough.”

 

“No, it isn’t.” Ava shakes her head and stares out over the ocean. “After she finally left Springfield, my mother drank like a fish for a year and when she realized that didn’t help, she stopped and moved on, cutting a wide swath through the men of San Francisco. As if that could somehow heal the gaping wound that had once been her heart. Eventually she decided to test the waters with women, all of whom were more than willing to welcome her with open arms. But none of them were you.” Ava glances back at you, and you wonder if she can tell how much her words have affected you. She sighs, looking down at her shoes and continues. “And then I introduced her to Michelle and it was as if you never existed.”

 

That one stung. Tears well once again in your eyes and you make a move to leave, only to find Ava’s cold fingers grip your arm, freezing you in your tracks.

 

“And I’ve regretted it ever since.” Her eyes meet yours and there is a sadness there, burning so deep that it takes your breath away. Once again you wonder what exactly is going on with this family. “There’s more to the story, but I can’t really go into it. Just…don’t go, Natalia. Please. My mother will need you. My only hope is that she will be able to let her walls down for you again.”

 

You open your mouth to speak as the music from the garden changes ever so slightly.

 

“Damn it.” Ava curses and looks at her watch. “I have to go. Just stay for the wedding. I know it’s hard and you don’t understand.” Ava tilts her head as her eyes silently plead with you. “Just _trust_ me.”

 

You close your eyes in defeat and sigh, and then nod. She had you at her very first please. You open your eyes as she squeezes your arm one last time.

 

“Thank you.” Ava smiles and then turns making her way quickly back towards the house.

 

You just shake your head and start towards the seats in the backyard garden and pray that you have enough strength to endure whatever lay ahead.

 

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

 

A gentle breeze blew from the ocean, salty and clean and you wished you had just not come. You should have stayed hidden away in your small safe world, with your nice husband and small son and forgotten all the should of, could of, never will be’s. Suffocating to death in your so-called perfect storybook ending.

 

You sigh, knowing that wasn’t the answer either. Regardless of what happened here in California, you know you have done the right thing, leaving Frank. You both deserve to be with someone who truly loved you. The look in his eyes when you told him you were leaving haunts you, and will for a very long time you’re sure, but deep down you could tell he’s been waiting for you to say the words for years.

 

You run a hand through your hair and glance around, looking for a place to just melt into and blend. The small garden is exquisite, and you would expect nothing less, with white tulle wrapped around everything, yellow roses and white tulips everywhere.

 

You look around and easily spot Josh Lewis sitting at the front of the small group of Olivia and Michelle’s friends who are gathered, laughing and teasing his wife Reva. He always was Olivia’s favourite ex-husband but having Reva here too is a little surprising. You sink down into a folding chair a few rows from the back, hiding from them behind a woman wearing a very large hat.

 

At the front is the minister, a smiling woman with short red hair, white pants and a matching loose flowing blouse, her green stole hangs down off her shoulders and a thick cross is dangling from her neck. She checks her watch and nods at a woman at the back of the garden near the stringed quartet. The woman is obviously the wedding planner and spoke into a small walkie-talkie

 

You weren’t ready for the soft music to turn into the familiar strains of the wedding march and you dip your head and hold your breath waiting for the inevitable. The guests around you all turn and you can’t help yourself, you do too.

 

Emma is standing there, bouquet in hand, slowly walking down the middle of the chairs that have been set up. You can tell she’s trying hard not to cry and you wonder if that’s because she’s happy or sad. Next is Ava, slowly making her way down behind her sister, smiling at various guests as she makes her way along. Your eyes meet and lock and she nods at you, her nerves seeming to settle before your eyes as she straightens her shoulders and focuses on the minister at the front.

 

And then the music changes again, a little fuller and brighter rendition of the march, signaling the arrival of the brides to be. And then there she is.

 

Olivia.

 

For a moment, your heart swells at how beautiful she is, as Olivia enters the garden from the left. It’s short-lived however, as you notice that Michelle has also entered from the right, as they take a few steps meet in the middle. They smile at each other, and their hands entwine and together they walk down the aisle.

 

Your heart is shattering in your chest, but you have no one to blame but yourself. You pushed Olivia away and left her to struggle on her own. You knew you had ruined your own happy ending with your fear and self loathing, trapped in a sham of a marriage with a man you didn’t love. You wonder if this is how Olivia felt all those years ago as you said “I do.”

 

Tears well as you know it probably felt a million times worse and you are so sorry for putting Olivia through it. You pull a tissue out of your pocket and dab at you eyes, as the women make their way to the front. You barely register the minister’s words of welcome as you dab at your eyes. Suddenly though you clearly hear the next lines, your mind trying to wrap around them, knowing you need to do something. Anything.

 

“If there is any reason why these two women should not be lawfully married, speak now or forever hold your peace.” The smiling redhead looks into her bible, about to continue with the small service. Ava, standing to the right of Michelle, glances at her watch and looks back at the guests expectantly.

 

Your heart is pounding loud in your ears as you try to sit there and do nothing. Sometimes though, actions speak louder than words. Olivia taught you that so many times, long ago. Apparently now was the time for your grand gesture of love, to show her what she means to you, even after all this time. Standing up, you only pray it will be enough.

 

“Wait!”

 

Your voice is clear and strong; you’d never know you felt like your world was exploding around you. The entire group turns, and stares at you in shock. Somewhere in the back of your mind you’re sure you hear Reva say “I knew it!”

 

You hesitate again, doubt worming its way into your thoughts, that maybe this was not such a good idea, but then you meet Olivia startled green eyes. And then there is no choice. There never was really and you know it. It’s always been her, it always will be.

 

It wasn’t fair and it wasn’t right to do this to Olivia on her wedding day, but when was love ever fair? You take a calming breath and straighten your shoulders; your eyes lock with hers and you prepare to speak from your heart.

 

“Stop the wedding.”

 

 

 


	7. Chapter 7

 

Wait a minute. That wasn’t you. Your mouth is open and you were about to speak, but you realize someone else has uttered the exact words you were just about to say. Olivia lips quirk into a lopsided grin and she gives you a small shoulder shrug and then you both turn to give your full attention to the person who has actually dared to interrupt the festivities.

 

“What the hell?” You hear Michelle sputter, echoing your own thoughts as you easily recognize the man at the back of the garden.

 

Jeffrey O’Neill. And he doesn’t look happy.

 

You gasp, as you try to wrap your head around what is going on. There is a flurry of activity around him, with several uniformed officers at his back with each passing moment. This doesn’t bode well at all.

 

You’re surprised to see his familiar face. You haven’t seen Jeffrey in years, not since Springfield had discovered he was alive and well, simply chasing a madman around the world. When she found out, Reva had divorced him faster than Billy Lewis could devour a piece of pie and you just shook your head at the time, amazed how life could throw you curveballs.

 

Kind of like today.

 

A shiver of doubt runs down your spine. Is Jeffrey still involved in Olivia’s life? Clearly he was if he was interrupting the ceremony. Is he interested in her affections now too? Is this what Ava had been talking about? You frown a little, and sink back down into your seat, your mind spinning as you try to figure out just what is going on.

 

You watch as Jeffrey’s eyes narrow and he slowly starts down the aisle, towards the women gathered at the front, a small satisfied smile forming on his lips, his men flanking him on both sides.

 

“Michelle Santiago, you’re under arrest for the attempted murder of Eduardo Rodriguez.”

 

Another gasp goes through the shocked guests and out of the corner of your eye you see Emma pump her fist. Olivia however looks very concerned, and shakes her head slightly.

 

“Jeffrey, what the hell are you doing? You’re going to screw everything up…” Olivia’s eyes flash in warning. She is scared of something, you’re sure of it and you just about want to crawl out of your skin to go to her side, but you wait for it all to play out.

 

“Trust me, we have him. Eduardo is safe and he’s alive, I’ve spoken with him myself.” Jeffery said quietly and you can see the relief practically pour off of Olivia. You see Michelle turn to glare at Ava, who looks extremely triumphant.

 

“This isn’t over, it will never be over.” You can just make out Michelle’s growl at Ava before she turns back to Olivia.

 

“Why, Michelle?” Olivia finally speaks, her voice low and heavy with sadness as her head tilts watching her lover back away slowly as the police edge closer.

 

“Rodriguez destroyed my family, and I vowed to settle it, destroying him and those he loved in return. What I hadn’t counted on was falling in love with you. I-I thought you loved me, too.” Michelle’s eyes plead, but even from this distance you can tell she’s insincere. You can only pray that Olivia sees through her lies as well. The brunette looks over at the approaching police, and takes a cautious step backwards.

 

“No, Michelle. Whatever we may have had, died a long time ago.” Olivia says the finality in her voice makes your heart ache for all the suffering she has had to endure. “And threatening my family, and my unborn grandchild, that was what took this from a bad break up to this sting. I can’t believe I was ever foolish enough to love you.”

 

Michelle blinks for a moment and then throws her head back and laughs, her mask finally dropping and her evil intent clear in every sinew of her body. You shift in your seat at the bald deceit finally displayed for all to see.

 

“Love is for fools, Olivia, haven’t you learnt that by now.” Michelle smirks taking a cautious step backwards. “Want. Take. Have. That’s what rules this old world. I want my vengeance and by God, I’ll still have it.” Michelle runs a hand through her hair, studying Olivia while she plotted her next move. “It was because I wanted to send Emma to boarding school that tipped you off, isn’t it? I knew that was a mistake the minute I said it…”

 

Olivia’s eyes narrow and your heart clenches at the thought of sweet little Emma shipped off to some lonely existence far away from her mother’s love. How did this woman weasel her way into Olivia’s life so completely? And once more you feel the bite of guilt, knowing that if you had been here, Olivia wouldn’t have been vulnerable and most likely none of this would have happened. You should have been here to protect your family, to defend your girls, and most importantly keep Olivia safe.

 

“Well, that’s it then. I’ve been in tighter situations than this, my dear. You haven’t seen anything yet.” Michelle flashes a cheeky grin and slowly backs up from the harsh glare Olivia is giving her. Noticing that the main aisle is filled with approaching police and a very determined Jeffrey O’Neill, Michelle moves quickly, pushing Olivia towards them and then turns to flee. You have a moment of panic as Olivia stumbles back into the group of men and you bite your lower lip as Michelle stops short, obviously not expecting to come face-to-face with a suddenly very surly looking minister. 

 

“Police, freeze.” The minister growls and pulls her concealed weapon out, easily pressing it into Michelle’s ribs, shocking the brunette for a moment.

 

“Don’t make this harder than it needs to be, Santiago.” Jeffrey says in a calm voice, clearly trying to keep the woman from doing anything too insane. You don’t hold out much hope though.

 

“You placed an undercover cop as our minister. Priceless. You thought of everything, didn’t you, O’Neill?” Michelle laughs, the crazed sound sending shivers down your back and you know that she’s suddenly very dangerous. Trapped, with nothing to lose, the woman would do anything to escape now. Anything.

 

“I’ve read your file. You’re a slippery character, Michelle and I don’t take chances where my loved ones are concerned. You should have thought of that before you threatened to kill my son-in-law.” Jeffrey’s finger twitches on his gun and for a moment you’re worried he’s going to shoot.

 

Michelle just shakes her head, before laughing and throwing her elbow into the minister’s gut, twisting to grab the snub-nosed revolver before stepping down hard on the undercover cop’s foot. Pushing the redhead hard, she sends the fake minister flying into the bushes and dashes the other way, heading towards the seating area.

 

“Damn it, she’s escaping.” Jeffrey calls out, and his men start to fan out, but you know it will be too little, too late. Michelle knows it too, if the wide grin on her face is any indication and a fresh wave of anger at the woman bubbles deep inside.

 

You don’t know what makes you do it. Maybe it’s the adrenalin from the day, or maybe it’s the thought of how Michelle treated your loved ones, how she’d abused their love and trust. You see her running down the side of the seating area, coming straight for you. You know what you have to do.

 

Michelle is clearly focused on keeping the police in her sights, waving her gun at them as she makes her way past the cringing and scattering guests. She’s drawing closer to you, there’s no time to lose. You send up a quick prayer, swallow hard and stick your foot out.

 

The satiny material of her dress brushes against you first and then you’re hit with the solid connection of her legs against your own. You give a good sweep up, taking her legs out from under her and you watch, as gravity does the rest. Everything seems to move in slow motion, as Michelle glances over at you and realizes that she is falling. It clearly registers just who is responsible for taking her down and the woman is definitely pissed.

 

Your brief moment of triumph is short lived and quickly turns to panic as you see a glint of steel, as she turns the revolver towards you. An eerie peace washes over you in that instant as you realize that you’re going to die protecting those you love, and you know without a shadow of a doubt that that is just fine by you.  

 

God’s will be done.

 

Time seems to stand still and then it’s as if the sun comes out again. You can’t help but smile as Michelle’s face hits the dirt and she lands with a solid thump on the lawn. Several police officers pounce on her, kicking the gun from her hand as you stay perfectly still. Michelle curses and swears as they lock handcuffs onto her wrists and pull her to her feet, her hair and dress full of grass clippings and grunge.

 

You watch as Michelle is jostled by the cops but still is able to glare at you and you just stare back at her. You feel the anger churning deep inside and you let the emotions bleed out of you as you growl at her, low and deadly serious for her ears only.

 

“Don’t fuck with my family.”

 

Your eyes lock, and Michelle blinks first and you know you’ve won. The police pull her away and you sigh, pleased that the worst is over.

 

You turn to find Olivia and the girls in the crowd, all of them safe and smiling at you. Olivia wraps her arms around her family, staring at you with eyes that feel as if they are burning right into your soul. She mouths a silent ‘Thank you’ to you and you’re suddenly overwhelmed with joy, as you nod and smile back. Olivia seems to pull herself together before your very eyes, straightening her shoulders before turning to address scattered guests.

 

“Please, friends.” The crowd settles and turns to look at a smiling Olivia, clearly relieved that the whole mess is over and done with. “The band is already paid for and the food will just go to waste. Please stick around and we’ll still have a party tonight.” Olivia looks straight at you, her eyes burning into you as if being seared with a brand. “I suddenly feel like celebrating.”

 

A small cheer goes up and you decide it’s time to make your way towards Olivia. It’s as if the sea of people swirling around you parts, making way for you to walk as you go. You pass Jeffrey who nods warmly at you, and Ava, who reaches out to squeeze your arm, smiling as she speaks on the phone to her rescued Eduardo. You smile back and then suddenly find yourself wrapped in Emma’s tight embrace. Squeezing her back, you pull apart as Emma glances up over your shoulder and smiles. You find yourself spun and then released as you are suddenly face-to-face with Olivia.

 

Once again it’s as if time stands still, as you both just stand and stare at each other, lost in each other’s eyes.

 

“You stayed.” Olivia finally says quietly, as if not quite believing her eyes. All you can do is nod and try not to cry. “Come with me.”

 

Her hand trembles as she slides it down your arm, to tangle her fingers with your own. You feel as if a weight has been lifted from your chest and that the world suddenly has shifted back into place. You know you would follow her anywhere.

 

“I think we really need to talk.”

 

 


	8. Chapter 8

 

She holds on to your hand, clutching it tight, like it’s a lifeline. And maybe that’s exactly what it is, a way back into the light for both of your broken souls, scrambling desperately out of the gaping hole that was created so many years ago. This could be your fresh start, a rebirth, the promise of a new beginning, if you can both just get past the hurt and take this last leap of faith, together.

You’re almost afraid to hope after all this time.

“I want to show you something.” Olivia’s smile is warm and mischievous, reminding you easily of the woman you knew so long ago and you can’t stop the answering grin as you nod. You follow her, quickly making your way through the milling guests that the wedding planner is trying manage and head out of the garden. You notice a small pathway at the side of the mansion that you had missed earlier, with wait staff dashing back and forth as they prepare for the evenings festivities.

This side of the lawn is a flurry of activity, as tables have been set up for wedding guests with a small stage area where the band is doing a sound check. You are whisked past the stage and a small dance floor that has been set up on the lawn. The reception was apparently going to be held here, if white gauze and small white twinkle lights everywhere and servers busily lighting tea lights at every table is any indication.

Olivia looks back at you, watching for your reaction as she takes you a little further along the lawn, and you suddenly falter, gasping at what you see before you. It’s clearly a replica of the gazebo from the park in Springfield, only smaller and overlooking the ocean, in a perfect spot to watch the crashing tide come in and the gloriously setting sun. You glance up at Olivia who is smiling sadly at you.

“I had it built when I bought the place and hoped someday, maybe I’d be able to share it with you.” Olivia’s eyes suddenly well with tears and your heart clenches, the pain of seven wasted years catching up with you both again. Quietly she leads the way, both of you eventually leaning against the rail, watching the restless waves churning below.

“Natalia,” Olivia says softly, glancing down at your entwined fingers before looking back up into your eyes, the pad of her thumb drawing gentle circles across the back of your hand, distracting you. “I know there’s a lot that we still need to discuss, but there’s only one thing I need to know. What were you going to say if Jeffrey hadn’t interrupted you?”

Tears unexpectedly prick at the back of your eyes and you flash back to that horrible moment when you thought you would lose her again, your heart thundering in your chest, breaking all over again. Taking a deep breath to calm your nerves, you stare into her eyes and know that there will be no more waiting and hiding between you any more.

“I love you, Olivia,” You say instantly, without hesitation, finally speaking from the heart, from your very soul. And it feels so good to look her in the eye and say it, like a weight being lifted from your chest.” I feel like I’ve loved you forever. I was prepared to stop the wedding and tell you that, in front of everyone gathered, and I would have if Jeffrey hadn’t arrived. I should have told you that upstairs when I asked if you loved Michelle. I should have told you that in the cemetery over seven years ago, when you bared your soul to me. I’m so sorry,” Tears spring to your eyes and you turn away. “You have no idea how sorry I am…”

Olivia moves closer, and you feel her warmth at your back before her arms wrap around you, making you feel safe, as if you were finally where you belonged. You feel her sigh against your hair and you wait for her to speak.

“As I recall, I’m not blameless here either,” Olivia’s voice is low, ticking your ear as you try to focus on her words. “I wouldn’t let you speak your heart. I thought we were doing the right thing too. God, I was such an idiot,” Olivia said, shaking her head at all the mistakes along the way. “When we moved to California, my life was such a mess and it was my own damn fault. I was trying to do what was the best for everyone, and all I ended up doing was making us both miserable.”

“Olivia, don’t…” You turn in her arms and start to defend her decisions, but she waves you off, shifting to your side and leaning against the gazebo rail next to you.

“I’m not proud of what happened after that. I drank.” She glances down and then back up, staring at you, hard, lifting one of her eyebrows in that adorable way of hers to make her point. “I drank a lot. Until I finally realized just how much I was hurting the girls and myself. And then I just tried to keep busy, focusing on my work and I’m ashamed to say it, any warm body that caught my eye, men and then eventually women. And then Michelle came along, and for a while I thought it was enough, but it wasn’t. She was just using me.”

Olivia stares out over the ocean, the sun slowly dipping into the sea. “Then again, I suppose I had been using her too. I was looking to replace you in my heart, I guess, and I should have known…” Her green eyes flick back to stare at you once more, the heat between you sparking back to life. “You’re one of a kind.”

You reach out and squeeze her hand, touched at her words. And you can see in the depths of her eyes that she means every one. Olivia sighs again and looks back out over the ocean.

“I actually thought about returning to Springfield a few years ago, just to be near you again, but I couldn’t bring myself to disrupt your happily-ever-after, with your beautiful son. I visited once, finding you in the park playing with Nicky, he couldn’t have been more than three or four. You looked so happy…” Olivia’s voice fades as she becomes lost in memory. She turns back to face you, her eyes once more shining with tears. “ I…I couldn’t destroy that for my selfish desires. So I left again.”

Your mind reels at how close she had been to rescuing you and you had no clue.

“God, Olivia,” You turn to her and stare up into the saddest green eyes, reaching up to wipe away the moisture gathering there with the pad of your thumb. You smile softly as her eyes flutter shut and she leans into your touch, as you gently cup her cheek. “The only thing that made my days bearable was Nicky.” Your own tears finally start to fall as you squeeze out the painful truth. “And the memories of you, of our time together. I wanted to leave Frank and that life I was trapped in so many times, but you had left me, leaving me there to deal with it all alone, without much more than a stilted goodbye. I thought you hated me.”

You close your eyes, lost in the past, when you feel her arms wrapping around you, pulling you to her again. You’re surrounded by her warmth, the scent of her perfume and something all Olivia soothing your mind and soul, and you hold on for dear life.

“I could never hate you,” Olivia murmurs into your hair, as you snuggle closer, nuzzling into the crook of her neck. You never want to let her go, but she leans back so she can catch your eyes once more. “I love you, Natalia.”

Your heart thunders in your chest and you wonder if she can hear it, if she knows that was the answer to a prayer you’ve been whispering to God for years.

“God, I love you,” you whisper back, enjoying the taste of the word rolling in your mouth again, feeling as if a weight has been lifted from your soul, like the universe suddenly righted itself.

And in this perfect moment, it is enough.

 


	9. Chapter 9

 

A gentle ocean breeze blows against your skin and you sigh, content that you are finally where you need to be, where you should have been all along. You soak up the warmth and security you feel in Olivia’s strong arms, as she holds you close, almost as if she’s afraid you will disappear. You know she needs to hear the rest as much as you need to say it, to clear the air and reveal the truth in your heart so that you can move forward to a brighter future, hopefully together. You reluctantly pull back from the safety of her embrace, wiping the tears from your cheeks as you try to form the right words.

 

“When I got the invitation from Emma and Ava, I felt like my last ray of hope was being snuffed out. I was suffocating, trapped in a life that I didn’t want and with a man I didn’t love. To add insult to injury was that I had willingly done it to myself.  I’d gone into it with my eyes wide open, thinking that it would be the best for everyone.” You move away from Olivia’s warmth and move along the rail of the gazebo, turning from her intense stare to look out at the setting sun, lost in the swirling memories of your doomed relationship with Frank. “I should never have gone into a marriage with such low expectations. I should have known better and I have no one to blame but myself.”

 

“Natalia,” Olivia murmurs your name softly as she reaches out and softly touches your shoulder, bringing you back to the here and now as her simple movement soothes the ache in your chest. “I didn’t help things either. I should have done so many things differently…” You shake your head to stop her words, your eyes locking with hers, the years of sadness and pain bleeding through, lurking there just beneath the surface.

 

“Shhh…you had nothing but my best interests at heart. We were scared, both of us, and I hurt you so badly. I see just how much agony my wedding must have caused you, and it breaks my heart.” Tears well in your eyes, and you watch matching ones well in Olivia’s as she shifts, not denying your words. “No, I should have never let it even get that far and because of my weakness we have all suffered, for far too long.”

 

You sigh and turn away to stare out over the ocean again, the pain almost too much to bear. So much lost time, just thrown away, for what? You wipe away the falling tears and shake your head. God might forgive you, and possibly Olivia if you’re very lucky, but you know you will never forgive yourself.

 

“Anyway, the wedding invitation arrived in the mail and I resigned myself to letting you go, letting that beautiful, impossible, dream of us go. And then I somehow found myself sitting at the gazebo in the park yesterday afternoon, watching Nicky play with the ducks as they floated past and I…” You pause, and watch the crashing waves far below for a moment. You had been so alone and lost, it had seemed like there was no way out of the misery.

 

You shiver at the memory of the dark thoughts you had entertained, pulled from the memory of them now as Olivia’s arms wrap around you from behind and she holds you close, nuzzling into your hair, her silent strength encouraging you to continue. You smile sadly and lean back into her warmth.

 

“I-I hit rock bottom, Olivia. My life was a mess and I was sinking fast. The thought of you getting married, to another woman no less, well, it just broke me. The only thing I could do was to pray. So I prayed for strength and wept as my son’s laughter echoed around me.”

 

You run a hand through your hair, the cool breeze from the ocean picking up a little as the sun begins to dip below the horizon. It would be getting late in Springfield, Nicky would already be asleep, safe in his little bed in the spare room at Buzz and Lillian’s. He had been so excited when you dropped him off to stay with Pops and his Nan. Little did Nicky know that you were about to change his entire world. Olivia’s arms tighten around you and you smile, knowing it was the right decision.

 

“I was slowly dying inside. The woman I used to be was withering away, a shadow of who I was meant to be, who God wants me to be. And I knew that there was no one who could save me from this, except myself.” You shift and turn in Olivia’s arms, noticing the tears on her cheeks. You smile up at her and gently wipe them away with your thumb.

 

“And whether you would be here at the end of this journey, or not, I realized that I needed to take care of me for a change. How else could I ever look Nicky in the eye? Or Rafe? Almost more importantly how could I ever look at myself in the mirror? So I called Mel and started the divorce proceedings, booked my ticket online and finally had a long talk with Frank, ending it.”

 

You turn to stare out across the ocean once more, as the sun finally disappears into the sea. You can picture the look in your husband’s eyes, when you tell him you want a divorce, the fear finally realized, and almost a hint of relief, as if he had been expecting this. He didn’t even try to talk you out of it, simply standing and silently nodding, until you heard the sound of Frank’s boots loud on the wide plank floor of the farmhouse as he left, muttering that he would be at Buzz and Lillian’s.

 

You feel Olivia’s gentle fingers running through your hair, tucking a stray lock behind your ear, and you sigh. Somewhere in the distance you hear the band start to play and the sound of people milling and talking. The real world is starting to intrude once more, but Olivia’s touch grounds you and you turn to look up at her once more.

 

“And now you’re here,” Olivia whispers softly. “With me.”

 

“If you’ll still have me,” you swallow hard, the cold fingers of fear clutching at your stomach as you look into Olivia’s piercing green eyes. “I choose you, to be with you, to share my life and raise my family, with you. I know there’s still so much to work out, there is nothing I can say to change the past, but I can only pray that there is some hope for the future.”

 

“If I’ll still have you?” Olivia snorts and then smiles, sending your heart soaring as she pulls you closer again, your bodies pressing flush against each other, making it hard for you to think, only wanting more of her, to be closer to her. Her finger tucks under your chin and tips your head back, to once more fall into the depths of her eyes. “Please, stay?”

 

Your breathing hitches and your eyes lock with hers. You see the pain there, and the overwhelming love reflecting back at you. There is plenty to still work out, to talk through and atone for. But in this frozen moment, there is only the two of you.

 

“Always.” You smile, your heart leaping with joy as her smile lights up her face.

Olivia’s head dips, bringing her ever closer as your eyes flutter shut…

  



	10. Chapter 10

 

The very air around you seems to still in anticipation, as Olivia draws nearer and you wait breathlessly for the touch of her lips on yours. Instead though, you hear giggles and a discreet cough from somewhere behind you and then the rattling vibration of Olivia’s annoyed growl. The warmth of her forehead bumps lightly against your own, pressing against you with an accompanying frustrated sigh and suddenly it feels just like old times again.

You don’t know whether to laugh or cry.

“Wow, way to rebound, Mom. I think I’ve got whiplash.” Emma’s teasing voice breaks through the haze and your eyes blink open. You can’t remain disappointed as you look past Olivia and see the biggest grins on the two young women standing there, looking at you both. Olivia smirks at you and then turns to her daughters, standing on the lawn watching. You see her lift her eyebrow and glare at them, but they simply giggle louder.

“We were wondering where you two had disappeared to,” Ava says softly, resting her hands on her lower back to ease the discomfort of the baby pressing into her. “Clearly there was no need to worry.” You feel the loss of Olivia’s warmth as she shifts away, moving to address her daughters fully, smiling indulgently at both of them.

“We needed to…talk.” Olivia glances back at you and the tender smile on her face, meant for you alone, makes your heart sing.

“Is that what you’re calling it now? Funny, there didn’t seem to be a whole lot of talking going on,” Ava sasses back, earning a snort and an appreciative elbow poke from Emma. It hits you how amazing it is that these two girls have grown into sisters. The time on the west coast together has been good for both of them. And for a moment you realize that maybe some things are meant to happen for a reason.

“You are so bad, “ Emma chuckles and then turns serious again. “ And for the record, can I just say that I am so glad Michelle is gone. I never did like her. And that whole plan of hers to ship me off to boarding school was so not cool.”

“I never would have let that happen,” Olivia frowns as Emma’s words sink in. “Wait a minute, you knew about that?” Olivia raises an eyebrow as she most naturally slides a hand down and lets your fingers tangle together. She draws you along after her as steps out of the gazebo and down onto the grass to join her girls. A peace settles over you as you realize that it seems like the whole family has been waiting a long time for this, as if waiting for you to come and claim them as your own.

“Michelle wasn’t very secretive about what she thought of me.” Emma’s voice is laced with anger, and her eyes seem to darken, speaking volumes, and you know there’s a lot more there that the girl isn’t saying. Your heart clenches, wishing you had been there to protect her, defend her. At the same time though, you know that you will have plenty of time to talk to her about it now.

“I’m sorry, baby. Michelle was…” Olivia sighs, obviously not sure what to say about the whole sordid mess. “She was an error in judgment. A bad decision, that just got out of hand.”

Sadly, Olivia glances back over at you and squeezes your hand, as if to reassure herself you are still there, at her side, giving her strength. Her eyes narrow, as if she is suddenly searching for something in your gaze. “I do that, every now and then.”

Your eyes widen, and you know she’s talking about leaving you with Frank all those years ago. You look down, as your shoes suddenly seem very interesting, the intensity of her gaze too much to take. Olivia’s squeeze to your hand again draws your attention back up again and you see nothing but adoration in the green depths. So many mistakes, so much lost time, for both of you. Olivia smiles softly at you and gently pulls you closer to her. Slowly you all start to walk towards the gathered guests up on the lawn by the house.

“Jeffrey took her in for booking,” Emma said happily. “I held the door open for her as they put her in the car and hauled her sorry butt downtown.” You shake your head and smile over at the clearly pleased girl.

“And Edwardo?” Olivia turned to Ava, who also had a huge smile on her face.

“I spoke to him, he’s shook up but fine. Jonathan’s agents were able to get him out safe and sound from Michelle’s goons in Argentina.” Ava’s hand idly circles her stomach and relief all but pours off of Olivia. So much deceit and betrayal, your heart aches for them all.

Olivia nods and turns back to you, her eyes growing darker as memories seem to swirl around her. You squeeze her hand and smile up at her, trying to send her your silent support. She lets out a long slow breath and begins.

“Ava introduced us and there was an immediate chemistry. Underneath it all though, I had a feeling that Michelle was up to something, but I couldn’t quite put my finger on it. And to be honest, I didn’t want to believe it,” Olivia pauses deep in her memories, her voice dropping dangerously as she continues. “Keep your friends close, and your enemies even closer, as Alan Spaulding used to say. I guess it just felt like she tried too hard sometimes, y’know? Pushing me to be with her, and it was nice, to be pursued and wooed.”

Your heart clenches with jealousy but you have no right, no claim. You let Olivia slip away. You give yourself a little shake, determined to not sink back into the past, and focus on your new future. To the days when you will woo Olivia yourself. The thought gives you strength as Olivia continues to explain.

“And eventually I gave in. We fell into a relationship and for a while it was good. Really good.” Olivia’s voice drifts off and she stares sadly into the distance and you see for an instant the insecure, complicated center of the woman, that very few people are allowed to see. You had the privilege once, long ago, before you ripped out her heart. She looks back at you with those sad green eyes and your heart just about shatters again at the vulnerability found there.

“I thought that maybe somebody finally just wanted to be with me.”

You swallow hard, her words hitting you like a punch to the gut. Olivia had truly loved Michelle at one point and that hurts more than you had thought possible. You square your shoulders, more determined than ever to prove yourself to the fragile woman before you.

If she will let you.

  



	11. Chapter 11

 

The honesty cuts you to the quick, jealousy burning bitter in your stomach, tears threatening, stinging at the back of your eyes, as this knowledge settles within you. Olivia watches you carefully, as you process this. It shouldn’t surprise you that someone as amazing as Olivia would find someone else to love. And there is nothing you can say about it either, having given up the right when you married Frank.

What fools you both were.

Your eyes flick up and lock with hers, both of you weary with the weight of your mistakes. And yet somehow, you have found your way back to this second chance, back to each other. You take a calming breath, knowing that things will be different from here on out. Any future together needs to be built on a foundation of trust and honesty. You can feel the energy crackling between you both, as your eyes drop to her full lips, and in that instant you can’t wait to show her just how much you want to be with her. Ava’s voice cuts through the sudden tension and you both turn to her, breaking the heavy silence.

“Around the same time, I had fallen hard for Edwardo Rodriguez. Mom had sent me over to run the new Beacon Los Angeles with him and well…” Ava smiled softly, her hand slowly circling over her swollen belly. “It wasn’t long before we were talking marriage and starting a family. That’s when I noticed Michelle began acting really strange.”

“More strange than usual you mean.” Emma grumbles under her breath beside you. You reach out and wrap a comforting arm around her narrow shoulders, smiling softly as she leans closer and hugs you back with a sad little sigh.

“Things were going from bad to worse with Michelle. Once we became engaged, it was as if she was a completely different person. She was possessive and demanding, trying to control everything, wanting to know where I was at all times and trying to come between Emma and myself.” Olivia pinches the bridge of her nose, the difficult memories flooding back. “And the really weird thing was that she was obsessed with Ava’s relationship. I began to think she wanted to be with Edwardo herself, but then she would flip out if I even spoke to another woman. It had become too much. I wanted to break it off and needed some time to think.” Olivia sighs, her eyes meeting Ava’s. “And that’s when Jeffrey arrived on my doorstep.”

You bite your lower lip, knowing that couldn’t have been a good thing. Complicated didn’t begin to describe this situation that the Spencer women were wrapped up in.

“Apparently Edwardo had asked him to look into Michelle’s background.” Olivia continued, her voice heavy with sadness. “There had been threats and funny business back in Argentina and when he had come to America he had hoped that it was all behind him. The threatening letters had started again, this time against Ava and the baby. Jeffrey said it all came back to a family vendetta back in Argentina, between rival drug cartels.”

“Edwardo and his mother had fled to America to escape this, but Michelle wouldn’t let it die apparently,” Ava continues. “She wanted all descendants to pay.”

“So I confronted Michelle,” Olivia sighs, looking back at you for strength. ““I tried to call it off and Edwardo went missing. Michelle hinted she knew where he was and that there were people ready to snatch Ava too. It was incentive to go through with the wedding. She needed her citizenship and my money to get her cartel properly set up here in the States.” Olivia turns to you, her eyes tearing and your heart breaks at how much strain she must have been under. Her voice drops to a hoarse whisper and you move closer, needing to be nearer to her. “I would have married her too, given her my fortune, to save my family. I would have done anything.”

“I know you would.” You reach out and cup her cheek, wiping a tear away with the pad of your thumb. She leans into the caress and you feel a soft kiss against the palm of your hand, burning you to your very soul.

“What Michelle didn’t know was that Dad was already working with operatives to find Edwardo and break up her fledgling cartel there. We were forced to play along, as long as my husband’s life was at risk. She wanted him to watch her destroy his family here, just like her family had been destroyed so long ago by his relatives. Damn her.” Ava all but growled.

“And just as I was prepared to tie myself to the devil herself, in this sting that Jeffrey had devised, there you were,” Olivia smiles down at you, her gaze softening. “Offering me a new beginning. I had no idea the girls had even thought to invite you.”

“Well, “ Emma all but bounced with happiness as she added her own bit to the story. “I just wanted Natalia to know about the wedding. A part of me always thought she was the one who got away.” Emma shrugs, her pain from the path not taken evident in the nonchalant movement. “So even though Ava wasn’t sure you would come, I had faith, took a chance and sent the invite.”

“I’m so glad you did, Jellybean.” Olivia smiles at her youngest daughter, as you squeeze Emma’s hand in agreement. The band grows suddenly louder and you realize that you have almost made it back to the gathered guests. People were gathered around the banquet table and drinks were flowing freely, festivities were well under way.

“Listen, I’m going to go change out of this…” Olivia looks down at her wedding dress, a little worse for wear after the events of the day. “Why don’t you all go grab a bite to eat and I’ll be back before you know it.” She graces you with a dazzling smile, and for a moment you forget to breathe.

“I’ll come with you, Mom,” Ava grins, running a hand through her short hair in frustration. “I swear my bladder is shrinking exponentially as this child grows.” Together you watch mother and daughter head down a different pathway towards the house and you are warmed by the knowledge that soon there would be a new addition to the family. You can’t wait to tease Olivia about being a grandma.

“We need a drink to celebrate!” Emma grabs your hand and pulls you towards the bar. You see a few more familiar faces sprinkled in the group, business associates from years ago when you were still working at the Beacon. You nod and smile at Josh, who smiles back warmly before returning to sit with Reva at one of the tables. Emma hands you a glass of wine and together you make your way to the side of the dance floor, and it isn’t long before she is filling you in on the boy she is dating at high school and how Olivia has been tormenting the poor fellow at every opportunity. You smile, knowing how terrifying Olivia can be when she wants to be.

The band takes a short break and a dj starts up for a while, more couples slowly swaying on the dance floor as you take another sip of your wine. You look up at the twinkling stars over head and can’t really believe you are here. You send a silent prayer skywards, knowing that you couldn’t have done any of this alone.

You are just beginning to wonder what happened to Olivia when she appears across the way. Olivia’s hair is still upswept with the diamonds in her ears and matching necklace around the long column of her neck. She has changed into a cream chiffon dress, which flows around her and yet hugs her curves in all the right places. Elegant heels complete the look and you smile as she finally locates you and Emma in the crowd.

Your eyes meet as the first strands of Unforgettable start to play, the lush voices of Nat King Cole and his daughter Natalie merging together, and you know this is a mutual favourite version of the song. She makes her way towards you as you flash back to the last time you and Olivia had heard this song together, it had been one of the last movie nights together at the farmhouse. Before your lives had been irrevocably changed and pulled apart.

Emma had fallen fast asleep and was tucked in bed. You had switched on the radio as you both finished up your dessert. You can still remember the flames from the fireplace reflecting in Olivia’s bright green eyes and the smell of coffee and cinnamon filling the air. You had looked up at her as she swayed to the song and wished you had the nerve to reveal what was in your heart.

That was then and this is now. And you have revealed what is in your heart after all this time and now you want nothing more than to be alone together, wrapped up in Olivia’s loving embrace. However, if you can’t do that then you can do the next best thing, the same thing you had wanted to do the last time you had heard this song play.

Olivia has stopped a few feet away from you now, standing there staring at you as if she is ready to devour you. Why are you even hesitating? Making your decision, you had your glass of wine to Emma with a smile, before moving to Olivia’s side, one hand slides along her bare arm, tangling your fingers together.

“Dance with me?” You squeeze her hand and wait.

A little surprised at your new boldness, Olivia swallows hard and blinks. You can almost hear her asking herself just who was this suddenly confident woman standing before her, asking her to dance in front of this huge crowd of people? Damned if you know. One thing is certain though, you are tired of waiting. You look up at her and unleash your ultimate weapon, flashing a warm smile with full dimples for effect.

A smile lights up Olivia’s face with delight and she nods, pulling you closer to her with a tug of her hand.

“I thought you’d never ask.” Olivia murmurs softly and together you make your way through the swaying guests to the small dance floor. You can feel many eyes watching you now, but Olivia’s hand squeezes yours, and the simple act makes you lift your chin and smile. Who the hell cares what anyone thinks, you finally got the girl and you want nothing more than to feel her swaying in your arms.

Out of the corner of your eye you notice Emma elbow Ava, turning in time to see you step out into a clear spot on the dance floor together, joining the few couples already there. Across the way you notice Josh grinning at Reva, who has paused mid-chew to watch as you slide your hands up along Olivia’s bare arms to lock around her neck. Your fingers find their way into soft thick hair, twirling stray strands that have fallen loose from her upswept hair. Olivia’s hands wrap around your waist, pulling you closer as together you move as one with the music.

It truly is unforgettable.

“I love this song,” You breathe against Olivia’s long neck, before glancing up shyly into the intense green eyes staring back at you. You can almost feel the eyes of everyone watching, burning into you, but more importantly, Olivia only has eyes for you. The rest of the place seems to fade away with that thought and you lose yourself in the motion of her body against yours, your hearts beating as one.

“I love you,” Olivia murmurs tenderly, the velvety layers to her voice saying so much more. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

“There’s no where else I’d rather be,” You answer back, without hesitation. “I love you too, Olivia. And this time I’m here to stay.”

Olivia’s breath seems to hitch at your words, and you watch as her gaze flicks to your lips, and you know that it is finally going to happen. You move impossibly closer, as your eyes flutter shut, both hearts thundering in anticipation. And then you feel the soft tentative touch of her lips against yours, before you respond in kind, pressing and moving as one, mind and soul seeming to melt together and time stands still.

It is perfection.

And somewhere, you’re almost sure you hear Reva holler. “It’s about damn time!”


	12. Conclusion

 

It wasn’t the view from the honeymoon suite of the Beacon San Francisco that made you swoon, although it was exquisite, overlooking the bridge and the bay.

Nor was it the overflowing glasses of wine, or the table laden with food, waiting for you to nibble away at, that made your heart beat faster than you thought possible.

And it certainly wasn’t the flickering and waving candlelight, bathing the entire room in a warm romantic glow, which made you tremble, weak in the knees.

It was the woman standing oh so close to you now that was affecting your senses, her intense stare reflecting the candlelight, her desire for you laid bare in the green depths of her amazing eyes. You were thrilled to discover that her lips taste of sweet red wine and her thundering heartbeat beneath your fingertips reminds you of the crashing waves of the sea. The time has come, and you are ripe and ready to grasp it for your own.

“Olivia,” You whisper her name like it’s a prayer, tumbling soft and reverent from your lips. And in truth it is, for she is your answered prayer, a gift from above to be cherished and thankful for. And that is something that you will gladly do, for as long as God’s grace allows.

After the final dance of the night at the reception in her back yard, Olivia offered to come with you to the Beacon San Francisco. She insisted that she be allowed to upgrade your reservation, and before you knew it, you were assigned the honeymoon suite. Although nothing had been said, you knew it most likely had been booked in advance for her wedding night and clearly it wasn’t needed any longer.

Olivia walked you to the elegantly carved door and there you stood, holding her hand like an awkward school child, not wanting her to leave you. But unlike before, in what seems like another lifetime now, you refuse to let such opportunities escape you, at least where Olivia is concerned, so you invited her inside.

Olivia smiled warmly and followed you in, grinning wider as you stopped in your tracks, amazed by the delights and treats spread out before you. Food and drink and a room full of luxuries awaiting your approval. You turned back to her, surprised and thrilled as she blushed slightly and glanced down at her feet.

“I called ahead before we left the house. I just wanted to pamper you a little.” Olivia had said and you threw yourself into her arms holding her close, never wanting to let her go. In your heart you knew the greatest treasure in the room was right there in your arms. Reluctantly you pull apart and begin to explore the treats around you.

So much time had passed, too much time really. This second chance was not going to be wasted you decided right then and there, as you got lost in the shadows of her eyes. Tomorrow you would touch base with both your boys, put your old life in order and speak with Frank…

You refused to go there, and turn your thoughts away, not wanting to dwell on Frank now. You have given him more than enough of your time, time you could have spent with this woman, in her arms, loving her. Regret washes through you, burning like acid.

You meet Olivia’s eyes, as she stands watching your every move, her eyes reflecting her love and devotion still burning bright after all this time. A miracle really, that shouldn’t be questioned, simply appreciated and thankful for. And certainly not to be wasted any longer.

Now it was your time.

Olivia stepped toward you then, the cream chiffon dress she changed into for the evening clinging to her like a second skin, hugging her in all the right places, beckoning you to touch her, to tickle along the soft fabric. You just know that it’s going to look even better off of her, in an elegant heap on the carpet, discarded and out of the way. You flush a little at the thought, your body reacting with a strong pulse of desire.

“You didn’t hear a word I just said, did you?” Olivia asks now, her eyebrow arching and a small grin teasing at her lips. And you realize you haven’t actually heard anything but the beating of your heart in your ears for the last few minutes.

You bite your lower lip and smile, shaking your head a little in answer. Truth be told you’re nervous, afraid you’ll do something to mess it all up. Afraid that Olivia will change her mind and come to her senses and toss you out of her life. You wouldn’t blame her one bit after everything you have put her through. But she just smiles at you and moves closer still.

“Hey, just relax,” Olivia reaches out and tucks a stray strand of hair behind your ear, breaking into your irrational fears. “We don’t have to do anything you’re not ready for. I just want to spend time with you. Okay?” Her touch settles you in a way and excites you in another. You swallow hard as she leans closer, moving past you to steal a strawberry from the overflowing fruit tray on the side table. She bites into it, slicing through the tender flesh with sharp white teeth, before sucking it into her moist mouth and chewing.

You forget to breathe for a moment, as you watch her, wishing you were that lucky little piece of fruit. She swallows, her eyes never leaving yours and then slowly offers you the other half of it. Your mouth opens and she slides it between your lips, her fingers captured momentarily. You gently suck on her fingertips before she gasps softly and reluctantly pulls them away. You smile as you swallow your sweet treat and enjoy the hungry look on Olivia’s face.

“I’m going to make you feel soooo good.” Olivia leans close, whispering hotly into your ear and you tremble before her, your body reacting not only to the words but the seductive timber of Olivia’s voice as it drops into its lowest register.

You moisten your lips, your mouth suddenly dry, as her eyes travel possessively along your body. She is not unaffected as you notice the heart beat twitching at the base of her neck. You are desperate now to touch her, to taste her, to just be with her. Before you know it you are leaning forward as Olivia stares into your eyes, almost daring you.

And for once you don’t hesitate. You don’t wait; there is no fear or guilt, only the feeling that time stands still, the two of you alone together, now and for ever. You don’t think, you just do, focusing your gaze on those perfect lips and then you quickly close the distance, capturing her lips with your own.

Her moan, soft and needy, vibrates against your mouth and you cling to her, going weak in your knees at the sound. Her hand slides up into your hair, tugging slightly and then holding you steady, keeping you right where she wants you.

“Please,” You murmur when you finally both break for much needed air. “Stay with me tonight?”

“Tonight, and every night.” Olivia’s eyes seem almost black with desire and you feel her tremble in your arms before crushing you in a searing kiss.

And then you are lost in a wave of sensation and pulsing need. Her hands are on your body, exploring, caressing, claiming you as her very own. Exactly as it should be. Somehow you find the way to the bedroom, the king size mattress soft beneath you as she pushes you gently back and you recline before her, her eyes traveling down along your curves. You blush at the appraisal but proudly stare back.

You are hers to do with as she wishes and you couldn’t be more thankful.

“Mine,” Olivia whispers tenderly before her eyes grow large again and lock with yours. “Finally.” Then she is descending, devouring you, taking you into her hands, molding you to her body. Her lips trace down your throat and she nuzzles along the collar of your blouse.

“Off!” Olivia all but growls and impatiently begins tugging at your clothing. Chuckling, you quickly start to assist, stripping down to bare skin as she does the same. The soft duvet below you and her warm supple curves pressing down above you are almost too much to take in. You run your fingers along her cheek, tracing her eyebrows, memorizing the flecks of colour in her eyes before Olivia once more dips down for a searing kiss.

You surprise both yourself and her as you roll her to her back and confidently begin to map her body, kissing and nipping your way along her body, finding favourite spots to explore and tease, as Olivia willingly remains trapped beneath you, moaning and writhing with need.

“Mine.” You sigh happily in her ear, echoing her sentiments, relishing the taste of it in your mouth, the sure knowledge that this gorgeous creature beneath you was indeed all yours. Your hand dips lower, across twitching abs, not exactly sure what you’re doing but sure you’ll be able to figure it out. You gasp at how wet and ready she is for you and then you sink into her warmth, filling her, truly making her yours.

Olivia’s hips arch off the bed and you move to meet her thrusts, but you refuse to be rushed though, continuing at your own leisurely pace. She growls a little in frustration, but you steal a kiss from her full lips to distract her and then reward her by adding the extra strength of your thigh sliding between her legs.

“Oh, God,” Olivia gasps, making a small kittenish sound at the back of her throat as you curl your fingers and find that elusive spot you know she won’t be able to resist. You swear to yourself that you will do everything in your power to hear that sound again, and again, and again. You sigh and make a sympathetic moan as Olivia shifts and bucks below you, before you claim her mouth again.

Kissing her hard, you feel her body start to tense and you know she is near. You lean back slightly to watch her, as she starts to lose control and let herself go, bucking and straining to pull you in deeper. You want to be closer, you need to be nearer. You want to watch her fall over the edge. The desire is too great and you slow your movements to get her attention.

“Look at me, Olivia,” You murmur, as bright green eyes snap open at your soft request, as she desperately tries to focus on your words. She is so close to the edge, on a razors edge and you know it. And yet she does as you ask and stares back at you. “I want to watch you come for me.”

She laughs softly, with a quiet joy and all she can do is nod and gasp as you flash your widest smile, rewarding her with a flash of dimple and begin to circle her clit with your thumb. It’s like you can see into her soul, and she is bare, heart mind and soul. She is overwhelmed by you, by your touch, by your love. You stare mesmerized as the wave hits her, and she falls over the edge, her body responding as she comes hard for you, shuddering her release in your arms.

“Natalia!” Your name tumbles from her lips, followed by breathy cries and still she doesn’t break eye contact, her green eyes exposing everything to you as asked. You begin to slow your movements, swirling slowly within her, and finally stopping as the last tremors cease. You shift from her and hold her close, your hands moving lazily along her body, not wanting to miss a moment of her pleasure.

Finally she sighs, a long satisfied sound that makes you smile. You worry you’ve worn her out, but Olivia just nuzzles closer, burrowing against your neck. You wrap your arms around her and hold her close and breathe her in, keeping her safe as she returns to herself. Your fingers trace lazy circles along her back, the texture of her skin intoxicating, calling you to continue to explore her tempting form. You are so distracted by her that you fail to see the mischievous gleam in her eyes.

Before you realize it, she has rolled you to your back, chuckling. You feel the stretch and pull of her stomach muscles against you and you shiver at the new intimacy between you. How could you have been so afraid of this for so long?

You blink up at her, as her indulgent smile warms you to your soul. She begins to move against you, her hands sliding slow and seductive along your skin. Her head dips and she steals a kiss and then another, and soon she sinks deeper into your mouth, your tongues dueling and playing together. Her weight settles on you, and you spread your legs wider, allowing her to slide between them to discover just how ready you are for her.

You roll your hips, unable to stop the moan of pleasure at the contact, and she drags her thigh against your center. A gasp of pleasure is pulled from your lips and that seems to inspire her to explore your hills and valleys.

Her fingers roam across your flesh, soft tickling trails down your sides, across your aching breasts and nipples. She finally moves from your lips and begins to nip down your throat, licking across your collarbone, as if needing to memorize every single inch of you.

You are burning up, writhing with want and need. Your senses are filled with nothing but Olivia and it seems she beats within your very veins, pulsing in time with your thundering heart. She dips between your breasts to find her way to your taut stomach, and you giggle and twitch once she finds herself there. You look down your naked body to lock with her vibrant green eyes, one eyebrow arching ever so slightly before she gives you a half smile and turns her attention back to tracing the salty hollows of your stomach with her tongue.

Is it possible to die from joy?

Olivia nuzzles down around your belly button, teasing and sucking the tender flesh there before moving up your body once more, to find and claim first one breast and then the other. Her fingertips skim the length of your body, her feathery touch barely registers as her hot mouth teases your stiff nipples to hard peaks.

Your eyes snap open when her hand finally wanders down to where you most need her, and you both sigh with pleasure as she finds you swollen and slick. You spread yourself a little wider for her and she takes the hint. She circles and teases your needy clit, and you arch up to meet her, gasping, trying to catch a breath. Trying to follow the tempting pleasure racing through your body.

It has never been like this for you. Never.

“Please…” You whisper on an exhale, slow and steady, wanting her to finish you, to truly make her yours. She feels everything so intensely, responding so subtly to your every move, just as you respond to her sure touch, your body inviting her love with every movement. Together you groan with pleasure as she smiles softly and presses deep inside, sinking within you, your bodies dancing back and forth.

Your arms have snaked around her neck, pulling her closer, as if you’re afraid she’ll disappear like a dream in the middle of the night. You gasp as she picks up the tempo of her thrusts, angling deeper, swirling and taking you higher with each motion. She pants into your ear, rocking you both harder.

And then you feel a rush, a wave of pleasure coming over you, too much to resist. You body starts to tighten, clutching around her fingers. Your back arches and finally you feel yourself seem to explode into a thousand million pieces, a guttural cry ripped from your throat as you buck against her.

When you can finally think again, you find yourself tangled together in a heap, exhausted and spent. Olivia’s softly kisses you, your thundering hearts beating in tandem, beginning to finally slow. You keep her close as she shifts her larger frame to one side and pulls the duvet over your cooling bodies. You curl together, touching each other softly, almost reverently. You lay breathing together, gathering strength and comfort from each other.

You look up at the ceiling and feel a peace come over you, that finally the world has righted itself, that God in heaven has smiled upon you. Olivia shifts, gently moving the pad of her thumb across your lips before dipping to kiss you once more. The kiss finally breaks and you feel the damp tears start to finally fall from your eyes.

“Hey, “Olivia whispers, concerned, her thumb moving to wipe the tears from your cheek.” Why are you crying?”

“It’s okay. It’s more than okay. I’m just happy, baby.” You snuggle into her warmth, feeling Olivia’s strong arms wrap around you holding you close, knowing you’ve found your way, together at last.

“I’m just…happy.”

And for the first time in what feels like forever, you really mean it.

 

 

The End


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